Tuesday, November 10, 2009

perfect imbalance.

"For God has not given us the spirit of fear,
but of power, and of love,
and of a sound mind".
2 Timothy 1:7

my mind isn't feeling so sound these days. over the course of the last few weeks, my life has become severely imbalanced. oh, all the plates are still spinning, but i am now running furiously to keep them from falling and shattering into pieces. as the end of my first semester draws near, i am consumed and overwhelmed by the final research papers, essays and exams. oddly, this one aspect of my life that is causing the most stress in my life right now is the one i inadvertently forgot to assign a "plate" to.

it certainly didn't help that i moved in the middle of the semester and am living amidst unpacked boxes. i've learned to be okay with the typical mess that ensues with two small children, but the disorder and disheleving that has occured with the move is deeply unsettling: a constant weight pressing against the corners of my mind, along with those photographs i've yet to print, and parker's (my almost-four year old) baby album i've yet to finish.

all that to say, the underylying question in all of this has been how do live my life completely devoted to Christ and yet, still live my life... day to day? in the past, i would've tried to balance it all out myself, carving out my fifteen minutes of quiet time with him in the morning or at night. but now, He reminds me that every moment belongs to Him - along with every plate. He reminds me of His call for my surrender and with it, the peace that passes all understanding. in the midst of the chaos of life, He calls me to, "Be still and know that [He] is God" (Psalm 46:10) and that through Him all things - yes, even this season of chaos - is working together for His glory, according to His purpose (Romans 8:28).

our trials may seem trite in comparison to others, but they are trials, nonetheless: "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him." ~ James 1:2-5.

the bible doesn't offer any scriptures on living what we have come to call the "balanced life". Jesus never gives us instructions on how to make appropriate divisions of our time and of ourselves. instead, He calls for total surrender; self-sacrifice and a heart that is undivided. our balance is in Him and of Him.

"God has promised to supply our needs (Philippians 4:19), and our resources are the riches of God's grace (Ephesians 1:7; Romans 11:33). From these assured "bank accounts" the child of God can draw on an inexhaustible supply to meet every need. Our Heavenly Father is desirous that we trust Him completely and implicitly (I Peter 5:7; Hebrews 4:16), follow the principles of His word reasonably (Psalms 119:11), and love one another fervently (John 13:35; I John 4:18-21). The Conclusion: This is the formula for a full life (John 10:10) that eliminates fear, and produces a balanced wholeness that brings fulfillment." ~ Dr. John Stall

admittedly, i am unbalanced in this life, but in Him - even our imbalance is made perfect.

2 comments:

  1. Well put. I'm juggling different plates, but they never seem to be in balance. And if it makes you feel better, J's baby book is not done. Unless you count our blog... :)

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  2. Well, I think this is interesting. I started browsing your blog (I like it btw) searching under different topics of what I thought would be of some encouragement (which you are, unkowingly btw) and I stumble on this blog. It was exactly what I needed right at this moment in time. Thanks for this.

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