Monday, September 15, 2008

preschool picture day...

chloe's school portrait (06)
tomorrow is picture day at preschool. which means that today, the day before picture day, is day of insanity for me. the effects of my perpetual procrastination [and ocd] are running rampant. as am i. like a chicken with its head cut off. everyone in my family knows this about me. we all know it's days like today that i'm not simply stumbling towards idiocy. i'm in a full sprint. this is especially true of my mother who - when i called her this morning to see if she wanted to meet me for some lunchtime pre-picture day shopping shopping - replied "oh dear!". as if she'd just received troubling news.

this would've been an appropriate to time to remind her that this is all her fault. no, really. it is. i will spare myself the utter humiliation of sharing the photographic evidence against her. but suffice it to say that every time i thumb through the album of my chronological 8x10s, i have to pause [and gasp] at nearly every one and say, "mother! it was one day out of the year. would it reeeallly have been so hard to pencil it in?".

the worst one that is comes to mind (forever etched in my memory and also in the yearbook) is the one from sixth grade. granted, at the age of 11 as a tween in my first year of junior high, perhaps i was at an age where i could have and should have kept up with picture day myself, long having learned the lesson from my elementary school photos. but no. this particular morning, i [obviously] overslept and then opted for a pale pink sleeveless shirt. and by sleeveless, i mean it was one of those sweatshirt-material-type shirts that looked as though the sleeves had been cut off. or ripped off. you know, something you might see someone wearing at the gym in the late 80s. as if that weren't painful enough, you can barely see the edge of the matching pink pleather-like bow sticking out of my disheveled hair. i vaguely remember the horror i felt when i got to school and realized that everyone else looked conspicuously spectacular that day. yes, this was the last time i ever showed up at school on picture day unprepared. it's probably also the last day i ever wore that pink sleeveless shirt. i'm not saying the pictures improved drastically over the years, but i do take complete and total responsibility for the ones that followed.

oh, one would think this is all my futile attempt at displacing yet another childhood insecurity onto my own children with the hopes they would look back on their school photos with fondness. and perhaps it began as such. but growing into this whole adulthood thing, i'm becoming less naive, albeit slightly so. no, i realize that - inevitably - my children will have a similar disdain someday when looking at their photos. perhaps they will wish that i hadn't kept up with it. i can hear parker now, "mother! would it have killed you to NOT put me in a smocked jon-jon when i was three years old?" or "WHAT was up with the sweater vests?" and chloe chiming in, "or those giant bows!". although, let's face it: more likely than not, when my children reminisce over old school photos, the attire will just be a side note to their memories of mommy's spastic behavior the day before and dreaded morning of. only then will i show them my album of school photos and we'll do what me and my sister and my mom do everytime we look at them: giggle ourselves to tears.

(and as a side note, i have to give bloggerific mad props to GYMBOREE. [one of] the only [reasonably priced] children's clothier that is still making clothing for KIDS that look like clothes for kids and not leftovers from britney spears' hay-days shrunk to size. i am horrified by what i saw at the department stores).

3 comments:

  1. I have to laugh because it's bc of my school pictures that I too, have been a little ocd when it comes to picture day for my children. Lord help em. I remember the time my dad was gonna trim my bangs the night before picture day, the freakers were standing str8t up on my forehead after he trimmed them, I vowed then never let my dad come near my hair ever again. Don't laugh, it makes me feel better knowing, everyone has some sort of school photo shame!

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  2. Nadia,
    I am cracking up... Richard is looking at me like i am crazy b/c i am actually "laughing" out loud. I am right there with you girl... I will go ahead and give you heads up on "big school"... they totally "messed" my school picture attire up when they look 1st day of school pictures in what I wanted to be their school picture outfits... then it was back to square one for me... so keep that in mind for years to come. love the blog... thanks for sharing shelly :)

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  3. sonya, the visual image of YOUR dad cutting your hair is hilarious in and of itself!!

    shelly, WHAT do you mean?? there are first day of school photos AND "school" photos for yearbook, etc.? yes, i am going to need some SERIOUS advising come next year when Chloe starts Kindergarten!!

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